Reality of being a writer

I’m a huge fan of positivity posts. Who doesn’t need a daily dose of inspiration? Pushing us to work towards our goals and chase our dreams. But sometimes it’s good to take a breath and check in with reality. To realise that our struggles don’t define us, but they do make us human.

Being a writer or any artist is tough. Don’t get me wrong, there are many perks. Take today for instance; I’m sitting in bed with my dog, listening to music, whilst drinking tea and blogging. But it’s not all glamorous: In fact, I’m not sure any of it is???

Today I thought I’d share the harsh reality of what being a writer is like for me. To let you know; you’re not alone in your fight. And that acknowledging our struggles doesn’t make us weak, it makes us honest. Maybe even a little enlightened.

Author self-doubt tumblr_nxeot3aztf1rj0hrio1_500
Credit: tumblr_nxeot3aztf1rj0hrio1_500

First of all: Shoat out to all working-student writers. Hurrah to us, juggling a full time job/course with other commitments, housework, family  and all the pressures life brings is usually enough for mere mortals. We’ve chosen to spend a dedicated amount of time and resources to building platforms, managing social media and actually writing a novel… or two. Congratulations, did you know roughly 80% of people dream of writing a novel but only a small percentage achieve this.

Next it’s a huge shoat out to writer parents. Whoop! Whether your children are young and need constant attention. Tantrums, potty training, endless kid parties and squabbling siblings. Where we need eyes in the back of our heads. Or older darlings: full of hormone melt downs, teenage dramas, social media mine-fields, confrontations over boundaries, boyfriend/girlfriend worries and … still squabbling siblings. And that’s all dealt with in a morning.

When do we get to write? How do we fit it in? But as we writers know… where there’s a will, and often a desperate need for sanity, there’s a way.

Writer Author Cat

Social life advocates: Bravo! I’m beginning to wonder if this is a rare breed of writer, because if you’re juggling either of the above, or like me – both, and you still have a successful social life: I’m wondering, do you only need two hours of sleep???

I’d love to go out for dinner with friends, meet the girls for coffee, fit in my yoga class, maybe take up tai chi too and attend creative writing class. But I wrestle to fit in all the other non-social stuff. Write. Walk my beagle. Read and read more. Blog. Fill cupboards with food, cook bloody food, clean dishes… You know the drill. You’re in it too. It’s an endless cycle of mundaneness, just to stay at base level. Tedious, repetitive and frustrating, doesn’t even begin to cover it.

To avoid these things is to ‘Attempt’ to change absolute reality, which will inevitably do more harm than good, internally speaking. (Internally = your mind and soul) Realise this is how life is and no longer will it disturb you, you can feel free. ‘Life is suffering’ – Budda

And there we have it. Life. Reality. Honest and raw. Be proud of who you are and the choices you make, because you’re unique and awesome. Take a moment to reflect on you’re journey and feel free to add a comment, sharing a little of it with me.

Thanks for reading.

Author Lorraine Ambers - YA fantasy romance writer

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© Author Lorraine Ambers and, 2018.

50 thoughts on “Reality of being a writer

  1. I must admit, I struggle to be sociable when I’ve really gotten into a project. Real life seems so much less interesting … though I do have an exceptionally dull job. Getting into that burlesque scene is actually helping the balance, as I now have a social scene with a creative slant to it (and I am always at my happiest when creating).

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Ha! Thanks for this.

    It’s been one of those months. My job is particularly hectic in Q1, followed by little kids, a spouse, and attempting to have anything that looks like a social life. Then, I decided to try launching a book while starting the first draft of another.

    It’s been a month! I need to do a better job of setting goals. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  3. It’s good to be honest about these things. The life of a writer may not be glam but I’m sure every writer would agree that the hard work involved in making time for writing is preferable to the apathy attached to a job you’ve no interest in. And then you’ll have one of those amazing days where it’s truly magical and that makes it all worth it!

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Thank you for sharing this amazing post! My dreams have always been to be a writer, but unfortunately the farthest I cam was my blog which I love. I try to write from the heart and I put a lot of thought into everything I write. I hope to some day write a book, but we will see!!! You are fantastic and have great insight that I really appreciate!!!!

    Liked by 2 people

  5. It’s so important to talk about the struggles, too! Being a writer and trying to juggle regular life on top of it is a lot. I practically have to force myself to work on my writing/creative projects when I’m done with my full time job for the day, but I do it most days anyway. And most of my “social life” consists of me meeting writer friends and writing/talking about writing together. It’s a good thing I love it so much!

    Liked by 3 people

  6. Ha ha, this is great. So honest and relatable. I need to share an example week because my week is so busy it is a wonder I fit blogging/writing in. I am working full time over 4 days, the other 3 days I get to spend entertaining my 4 year old. I then use my evenings to have a relationship with my husband and use play dates to catch up with friends. My writing? Gets squeezed into any free time I can find, often whilst supporting my son with his activity lol

    Liked by 3 people

      1. Ah, but then the grandchildren come along!! And along with them comes the expectations of your children to be good , ‘ever ready and on the spot, drop everything else and run to their aid’, grandparents… or be labelled ‘ unreliable’. I am sooooooo unreliable these days – but that old monkey ‘guilt’ jumps right back on your shoulder!! Cheerful aren’t I?

        Liked by 1 person

  7. I use to be the type that had the have a dozen people in my circle. Noise….constant noise was a must.

    Than I became a dad. Than I became a dad again. One day I picked up a notepad, my favorite pen and wrote a story. That’s all it took.

    It’s a different world now and for me that’s just fine. Sometimes it all comes down to change especially if you want to be a writer. I could not have lived this life twenty years ago but I’m glad I’m living it now.

    Excellent post. Thank you.

    Liked by 2 people

  8. Marion Njeri

    Writers can easily become irritable, boring, tired introverts because their minds are always engaged.
    So if you’re a writer and you life runs normally then you’re a hero

    Liked by 1 person

  9. A really sincere post looking at the not-always-magical life of writers, thank you for sharing.

    I have to give props to student and parents writers who manage that juggling act too.
    I admit, I pushed my own writing to the back burner during my college days just to get through term papers and projects. But I knew one parent who’d sleep in her car between classes, got home in time to pick her kids up/made sure they got to any practices/cooked dinner, and would stay up late to do her own writing when everyone was asleep! Just reiterates what you said, that when you’re really pumped and passionate about something you can always find a way.

    Liked by 1 person

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