Rose Key Heart Lock romance heartbreat Lorraine Ambers

How to recover from Heartbreak

This week’s post is inspired by the novel Heartless by Marissa Meyer. This melancholic, whimsical story opened up wounds that I’d hope were securely closed. It posed the important question, how do you recover from heartbreak, no seriously… How?

I have loved and lost many times;


  • The countless friends robbed away by the upheaval of an army up-bringing.
  • The death of my mother when I was a teenager.
  • A selfishness father, with a brutal temper who whipped in and out like a tornado, at his own accord.
  • Boys who posed as friends, fed me lies and fled with my kisses.
  • My first proper boyfriend, he fared no better than the other deceivers.
  • To my friends who drifted away with tide and time, long lost but never forgotten.

Perhaps this is why I write fantasy, an escape from reality. And perhaps this is why I write romance, ever the optimist.

notebook pen heartbreak Author Lorraine Ambers fantasy romance writer

I’m no different than any of you; it’s simply life and its consequences. Some would say fate. Everyone has loved and lost. We have all suffered the immense pain of a broken heart. The torment of endless questions, self-defeat and gaping wound that no one else can see.

I learnt many valuable lessons from my trials, and today I’ll share some of my wisdom. In the hopes that it will help those suffering, to shine a light on a subject that is brutal, raw but necessary.

You are not alone!

Be brave. My personal mantra and one born from regret. When I lost my best friend to crossed wires and miss communication, I believed that playing it cool would serve me best. My friends all advised me to speak with him, to be honest and hash out the problem. But I was scared, scared of rejection, scared of being laughed at, scared of my feelings. In hind sight, that was a huge mistake. Now when we pass each other in the street and politely smile the song ‘Someone that I used to know,’ skips through my head.

I should have been brave.

Listen to your friends. They’ll know when you should try harder, if they’re playing games or if red flags are flying and you should quit the chase. We won’t always listen or appreciate their advice at the time. But they only have our best interest at heart and at the end of the day, they will be the ones waiting when you’ve pieced yourself back together.

Robot broken heart

Because heartbreak is messy.

Have faith and believe in yourself. No one wants to hear, ‘There are plenty more fish in the sea.’ Especially not when all we hanker for is that one special person that we can’t envisage life without. Regardless, time rolls on. And with it, we discover who we are and what’s wonderful about ourselves. At the very least, we learn to fall in love with ourselves. I was single for two years before I met my husband. I discovered who and what I was capable of. Don’t be hasty in your search for someone else to fill the void. Instead of searching for Mr Right, put the energy into finding who you are.

(My geeky Greek mythology coming out to play.) When Pandora opened the box and let out destruction, strife and sickness, we must not forget that hope still remained.

Love Heart Hope

Give yourself time. None of us want to feel the twisting dagger of heartbreak and despair. Unfortunately it’s as much part of life as breathing. Take all the time you need, cry, and shoat, or bury your head under a pillow and wallow. Curse the romantic couples who flaunt their happiness.

See it as your chrysalis, for when you do emerge, you’ll be stronger and more beautiful than before.

Laugh. Maybe not immediately, but don’t ever underestimate the power of joy and fun. It’s soul rejuvenating.

Take stock of those that still surround you, for they are the ones who truly care.

Thanks for reading. Looking back what piece of advice do you wish you’d known? I’d love to hear rom you so drop your comments below. Remember you’re not alone.

Author Lorraine Ambers Web-Banner YA fantasy book review romance
© Author Lorraine Ambers &, 2016

Mystery Blogger Award


It’s an honor to reciprocate this award, but there is a little work to put into it:

  • Post the award/ image on your blog (see above)
  • Thank whoever nominated you and give a link back to their blog.
  • Mention the creator of the award and give a link back to their blog.
  • Nominate 10+ deserving bloggers and notify your nominees by commenting on their blog
  • Ask your nominees 5 questions of your choice; including one weird or funny question.

This award was created by Okoto Enigma and you can find her blog HERE.

Author Lorraine Ambers Web-Banner YA fantasy book review romance

I want to say; a massive thanks to Angie Dokos, not only for this nomination but also her unwavering support on twitter.

Here are my answers to Angie’s questions:

  1. What remains a mystery in your life? Or one from a distant relative or ancestor?

I wonder about all the beautiful friends I’ve known throughout my childhood, where they are today and how they’re doing. Luckily, I’ve managed to reconnect with a few but I’d love to find more.

  1. What is your favorite childhood memory?

The endless days, playing outside with the other kids in Afferde. The village was built to home all the army families living around Hameln. Germany holds great memories. I spent a month trying to build an igloo that never got higher than a foot off the ground. Built dens in the shrubbery. Climbed trees. Had my first crush. Dancing my heart out at kid’s club, (think running man and Vanilla Ice).

  1. What is your favorite holiday?

Disneyland! My parents promised me this holiday but it never happened. It was a big deal to me. Getting to be part of the magic and seeing how carefree it made my shy daughter was priceless.

  1. If you could go back and change something in your past, what would it be?

Honestly, nothing, not one single thing. I believe in the butterfly theory. If I changed one thing the ripple effect might mean that I would never have met my husband or had my two fantastic kids.

  1. What is one of your biggest fears?

Dying and leaving behind my loved ones! I know it’s morbid. Mum passed away when I was 18 leaving me, my brother and sisters to fend for ourselves. We stuck together and turned out alright but I don’t want that for my children.

My blogger nominations are as follows:

Eternal Scribbler

Judith Barrow

Kate M. Colby

Andrew McDowell

Mike Senczyszak

J.R. Handley

Kim Chance

Kristy Nicolle

The Door Keeper

Oristel Guenael

Time for the fun part, I get to ask my chosen blogger’s the following:

  1. Tell me who’s your favorite character and why.
  2. What is a pet peeve of yours?
  3. What’s your favorite comfort food?
  4. What brings you comfort when you’re miserable of ill?
  5. What do you do for fun? (Something that makes you connect with your inner child.)

I look forward to reading your answers. Once again, Thank you Angie! 🙂